I've never sat down to write a blog without having an outline in mind. I've always had it all figured out, exactly what I want to say, exactly how I want the outcome to look like.
This is spur of the moment, deciding-on-a-whim-type-thing. Which I don't do. EVER. If you know me, then you'll know I'm planned. But sometimes, those plans fail. And what do you do then?
I'm 21 and life is nothing like I ever thought it would be. I guess that's one of the main things I've learned: nothing is ever like you plan for. I guess it keeps life from getting boring.
And there are times, when dark storm clouds cover the horizon and it's nothing like what you planned for. Nobody ever plans for problems to come up, they never plan for worry to set in, and they never plan to have to resort to plan B. Annnnd that's where I'm at now.
Before this, everything always seemed to fall into place. My faith seemed to keep me grounded. And now, I'm struggling in putting those pieces together. My faith is something I have to work for. But at the same time, fighting for my faith made me realize that I WANT to search for God. I WANT to seek Him.
There's so much I'm facing that I'm unsure about. But I know that I'm not going to stop searching. I'm not going to stop seeking. I just have to work at it harder now. But I'm trying. I'm going to fight for joy.
Are you a planner or have you ever had to go with plan B? What are you fighting for today?